lloyd_dunamis (lloyd_dunamis) wrote,

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Happy New Year entry(?) o.o;

Everything I do, I get lazy on... I sit in front of my computer, turn it on, open up pictures, and stare at it. Not doing much productive things these days. Most of my journal entries are unfinished. They're one of the things I procrastinated on. Even projects. There's so many Flash projects I want to make, but my creativity, and being HARDWORKING at that, doesn't kick up!

We're moving on a new home not so far away, still in the same subdivision. The house is bunggalow, quite smaller than our current house, so we have to revisit all the dumped items upstairs and under the stairs. Phew! Sacks of clothes, a box of old toys, more boxes for dining stuff & displays (glasses, cups, frameworks)... They're just too many to handle. I mean, our house is stuffed with these old, unused items and we can't even use them in our current situation. And visiting these has led me to find more things I procrastinated on. I decided to dispose of the things that I won't be having benefit of but nostalgia- lots of it are test/scratch papers. I decided to keep notebooks (even old, brown-colored leaves), Prepaid Cards (I'd prefer keeping the old ones than the recently new Level Up! Cards)

And the fact that it's a new year... I received a quote text message: "You can't go back and make a brand new start, but you can start today and make a brand new ending" -Whit Criswell. That's right. What's keeping me not start anew because I can't end the things I'm holding on to. I'm thinking, perhaps it's better if you could just look back to "the things you had" some time in the future, but not actually want it back or something. All those things would be part of your past now, and of course has been part of my life. I think it's time to let it free from my mind's wanting.

What's worrying me about finally losing it is that it still might be of use to me at a later time. Remorse gets into me when that happens. It's like "I had it, I lost it. Now you want it back because you need it?" sort of thing. What's more regretting is that you have just disposed of that when you learned that you needed it for something!

... Perhaps that's too resourceful of me... or is it the other way around? I don't know. Maybe it has to do something with "creativity", the ability to do something not of the ordinary... Wait, that too is connected to being resourceful when you think about it... >.> I'm confused.

... Eh? Happy New Year. Yeah, the date's changed and all. Have we changed ourselves, though? Changed to good, or for the better, that is.

... K, I have written this journal for just 30mins at home. I hope I made sense out of it. If I did, I hope I get to do that more... I didn't even bother to check if it's really finished, too >.>;
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